i find myself closer to the bottom of the tool box
used only in extreme cases
every once in awhile
but forgotten when everything is good;
i get it
when the roof isn’t leaking
the drawer rolls perfectly
i belong in the tool box
just wanted to be more
Tag: Symbols
green screen
i love the way
you exist in this world with a smile;
dark clouds only over the horizon
your temprate ignites that darkness
leaving your forecast clear and sunny-
others will call it a fake
a green screen over everything
but i’ve been in that studio
they haven’t seen the production
your light cultivates;
grateful in hazel;
back back
you waaaay in the back
i’ve seen you before
not there or here your
the one that called me brown boy at school
i haven’t forgotten, but i am sure you have
it didn’t bother me because it was true
the way your friends laughed didn’t bother me
they were on your side, your team, your family
what hurt was that you are brown too,
was your brown- different? better?
like you went to an appraisal
they said you were faithful grateful in hazel
and i unstable;
like your brown was better then mine
i was the dirty that was ruining your good name;
and now i see you in the back of the room
looking at me with your hazel eyes
i’m sorry i was the dirt on the bottom of your shoes
for you were the worry on my pages;
i envyed your brown so i chased it
only to find me here talking to you
the one piggy that got away
raised with bricks
stacked high with a peep hole
just can barely see out
cold stays in
life stays out-
this was fine
no really i prefered it this way
all the big bads would come
brothers and sisters dissapear
but i was good;
pretended not to hear their screams
pretended not to care
pretended not to be home
that keeps me up at night
they rebuild out there
and i’m still in here waiting
for
something;
if they can’t get in
how can i get out
seems air tight
so how am i still breathing
a dream of butterflys
shattering these bricks like glass
i’ll be gone- so fucking gone
maybe to find those taken
those that never had a chance
or to feel everything that i could only dream of;
i hear the big bads coming again
they can’t stop them
all i have our ears preparing for horror
it’s safe here
it’s safe here
participation trophy; one for the grave
you matched and won
i’ll never forget that
you showed
deflated;
fates and twisted humanity
they go together like target and panera
every corner;
but ill tell our kids-
you showed when everyone pointed and questioned
you fucking tried;
more then they can say
return address
when i think about it
the world spins in the opposite direction
it’s fine i mean, she is her own women
but which star is receiving
for when i pray i know your wonderous name
send flowers and wishes for the future
mines and yours
i’m not the monster they said
not the one i was supposed to be
or the one you heard i was
i survived against
your brother in flames
you sister in tears
your mother digging a shallow grave
but i plead to you
watch our shadows closely
we wander off the rift
every no and then
but we will walk up straight
find our way
in your eyes
so maybe a cane for the shakey path
a jacket for the questionable weather
a stamp for this letter that one day will come to you
window watcher
all through a window
safe and secure
nothing gets to you
but i see it in your eyes
crave the touch of skin
it’s not a sin
to open up and let it in
open up
and let it in
sincerely, lily
lyin’ to these boys
you were never invited
fell ablaze and denied it
lyin’ to these boys:
you were never invited
wandered the world
can’t trust anyone with a mask on
brings you back to those days we act young
dark times: hood up top down rollin’ blocks
flying high they called us the young hawks
lyin’ to these boys
twenty five and we failed em
twnety one and we runnin’ out of time
you were never invited
stormin’ the waters but you babbies are just overcastin’
sorry;
but not really
the words out your mouth are just silly
yes really
no they aren’t busy
they just don’t want to see your face sincerely, lily
damn
lyin’ to these boys
your the guest of honor
just not for honor
two years will all be goners
you say we are all on a roll
dishonor to the ones out yondor
stay home
you weren’t invited
goddess of weather-
if i believe in the worst
it’ll come true
like a bullet from the sky
rain will fall at the tip of my tongue
on 11:11 a wish i sent for;
if we believe in the rain
the clouds are our god
the weather our bible
the sun our pastor;
a religion of change
stars and bars
you’re the baddest bitch
and you know it
everyone can see it
and this is the sales pitch;
stop playing.
i can see the practice
in the batters cage
straight to lights on centers stage
just to distract us;
i’m staying.
this world is yours
a seat for me in the front
my favorite scene i do my own stunts
above the stars and bars;
you’re slaying.
Saint's Muse 