I can’t shake

the days that we made those waves

 

even as the tides settle,

will splash and will sit there and wait.

The moon will shine and the dust will settle-

in the lull will feel full

sick and tired spinning like wool

waiting-

 

is this the end? tired on the beach listening to Gamb

is this 3005? picnic and the tides still settle-

but not me, waving arms like gym class

heroes will be up late

making their own waves.

 

I can’t shake this feeling that first wave

was only the beginning- and the big one is coming.

What happens after you know

everything-

when you know that you’re all I think about

when I’m writing it’s you on the paper

when I’m drawing it’s you in my eyes

it’s further then falling- I’ve crashed and holding onto you for air

(breathe)

what happens when you know

I only want to spend time with you

pick up markers from the store and write it on every surface

and it’s your face I can’t seem to shake

 

it’s not an illness but a blessing

to be in your presence I know I know

I’ve never taken it for granted

counting the seconds till you return

what happens when you know I check the watch on and off as many times as my eyes                                  blink

 

what happens when I tell you I just want to come home to you;

something simple- maybe a roast just a few jokes and will fall asleep

isn’t that the dream- have it every night

waking up to some toast and a fresh pot

but you’re all the energy that I need-

 

I pause, does this make me weak-

or answering the higher calling

that I can be stronger each and every week

as a we.

 

what happens when you know I want to want to wait for you down the aisle-

watch you worry about every step but never look down,

freezing cold hands but never look down

 

it’ll be okay because I’m not afraid-

it’ll be okay because you’re still reading and not running for the hills-

it’ll be okay because I’ve never looked down.

it’s not enough to go the distance-

you need to plan further,

roadblocks and finish lines are the same thing.

chances are you’ve worked your ass-

climbed to the top and seen the godly view from above

and forgot those underneath

you’re not alone, other do the same

some stay below to remember the Earth

to scared to chase the checkered flag-

if this is the end, where is the goal

the mound the cheers the trophy

or do we all get participation ones-

rapture and unload-

finger to hives

will dress to the nines

attend our own funerals-

say our best wishes-

know the person laying before is never the one wearing death in his eyes

never looking back

featured on our tats

still have marks to leave

not enough to settle

brake eye contact-

leave yourself to the dust

brushing off the old

stepped off the casket

never felt the cold breathe under the heels of yesterday

and the sun never felt so fresh.

I never want to be a villain-

casted out like Hanks

sitting like a gargoyle

invisible.

Words sharp

the knife kept clean-

but they remember;

The massacre of 09

and they see the monster from that time

but the wolf skin has been shed

sheep just like you-

but they see the wolf.

Sheep skin is expensive;

daily upkeep

expensive-

chasing idle sheep through marked forest.

can lose it all-

moving through the fields,

fangs left hanging

and they ran to tell the masses

they’ll plaster my face on every brick

they’ll never forget me.

Fully loaded

water damaged and I’m falling off the watch tower-

can’t remember the gates being flooded

the walls eroded

bloated eyes bulging

gate fell faster then before

fore

go long

water damaged–

feint and lisp

blanket ties and wash cloth.

high on eagle eye

no code name just a sharpshooter-

picking off helpless like Trump

dealing with the world like Trump-

spitting in the eye of my neighbor

make him late for his wife in labor

taking a step back and seeing the villain

pursing the name sake- leave em stranded on an island

nothing left but our name, can’t take it with us

leaving the island better then we left it-

it’s just our name- gravestone left blank, shoulda heed the warning.

boring, keep your mouth shut that’s a warning

keep your message to yourself or i’ll put you in mourning-

making peace out of rock paper and bullets

foolish baby shits will cry for a chance

but i took it to push my self to advance

point break- Dexter

with the laboratory

whippin’ up a delivery

speedin’ by the outsiders

miles lighter fire starter

burning down the past

find us in the road house

find us making music

dirty dancing

not for a single night

dancing from now

until we’re ghost.

 

seein’ glowin’ in 3D

featuring the place where I wanna be

meeting all the ones that helped me get threw the day

hay-day rolling with the hounds

new found love for the ground

too busy to dig up another mound.

 

can still hear her voice in my head

put down the phone and stop living in your head

made it out- didn’t show up on the feed

news isn’t old just a weak trait

always giving it raw- made straight

you bitches don’t know what it’s like to menstruate.

 

feeding the thieves a loaf a week

there just like us never leaving the weak

geeks chasing the freaks and i’ll be here at the peak.

 

woke up

going deep- third and twenty-seven

no pump fake hit it on the deep post.

pick six- six let loose

 

building caught fire- not a breakaway run-

terror.

place in the huddle only broken on command

 

safety valued more than two points

yet here we are: the game is over

we didn’t stick the landing

prayers are shot up like fireworks-

celebrated.

 

will forget tomorrow-

the completed pass- the hit stick- the downed teammate,

it’ll be gone like morning coffee.