I don’t remember drowning;
just struggling for air
wanting for it to end
wishing someone would save me.
I don’t remember drowning
I remember being helpless.
Tag: Writing
Can Opener
One problem I had
was I couldn’t use a can opener;
so I said fuck this I’m done.
Imagine if that short fuse was with my love-
one cut and your out
the slash you left was too deep so find the front door and don’t lose ya feet.
I think I should give the can opener another chance;
what do you think?
on one hand I miss kidney beans
the other
I don’t know pain.
Best Day Ever
I never took a day off
work around the clock never stop never falloff.
I never said goodbye to Trevor
left in a hurry always a new endeavor
a brother and I’ll miss the way you said whatever
whoever whenever this life wasn’t forever but wherever you are
you’re here with me like Common will let it Be
a Seven and a dream we made one hell of a team.
No matter where life takes me, find me with a smile
pursuit to be happy, only laughing like a child.
I never told Malcolm what he meant to me
through depression living life under suppression
now making progression through self-expression
and this is my confession that you walked me through
and when it’s my time I wrote this for you
you on the drums and I’ll be on the keys
a jam session no questions.
Now I know the difference between the ground and the floor
if we got to fight, I’ll be down for the war
thumbs up-
Thanks to you, I never turned by back on love
like a fool thought I was cool but you’re such a jewel
and I never thought life would get this sweet
it got me cheesin’ from cheek to cheek
weak in my knees at ease antifreeze
and I ain’t going to wait for nothing
cause that just ain’t my style
it’s you when I smile
watching you walk down the aisle
life couldn’t get better
this gon’ be the best day ever.
Thank you to anyone who read, liked and left a comment on anything I posted this year or ever. I appreciate you, happy new year.
~Sam T. G.
Angel of Two Fruits – Stainless Steel
I carry you with me everyday.
Find you in between the lines of each poem
in the songs I write and a god will smite
if I ever do wrong.
before me walks an angel
an angel of two fruits
and one bite, I was hers-
the sour outer to ward away the weak
until the sweet middle hold my tongue unable to speak.
Walking alone to the store
her shadow will hold my hand
and all the noise
with her the heart feels slow
a necklace of turbulence
a ring of the past
shoes of yesterdays choices
all these accessories
you’re the chain that never breaks
stainless steel one hell of a meal
and one day they’ll take a picture of me down on one knee.
Weightless around my neck
never in anything Aztec
sheltered from the storm, low-tech
rising above the rift and diving on the raft, high-tech
never taking a day off- never needing a rain check
the one and only, cashing in that pay-check.
3rd Degree – Tom Ford Suit
I sat in the shower longer this morning
to wash off yesterday
the burn marks on my skin remain
but under the water-
it’s invisible.
Walk through the park
stop at the deli
read a book on the train
they would never stop me and ask how I got these marks
they can’t see them.
I spend hours scrubbing-
the picture of being perfect signed into my mind like a branding
the perfect being doesn’t show these weaknesses
they don’t have burn marks.
I don’t roll up my sleeves
wear shorts in the summer time
laying on the beach, in a Tom Ford suit.
Sixteen Fears
I asked my buddy once
what he does to calm himself down.
He is an angry guy and he doesn’t get into fist fights
that I know of
so he must have a trick.
He told me he counts
s l o w l y
lowers his heart beat before he Hulks out.
After publicly laughing
and secretly taking notes
I tried it at home;
One, number of episodes I’ve seen of Ferrigno’s Hulk.
Two, number of times I had to convince myself that I’m not losing it before actually giving this a chance.
Three, pick up sticks.
Four, the number of times I thought about calling the love of my life and not doing it because I don’t want to be a bother.
Nine, worries I’ve given before reminding myself that she loves me and I need to escape the narrowing halls of my own mind.
Sixteen,
Eighteen, the year I decided to burn the world down from a water tower.
Twenty-two, the damn Taylor Swift song that will probably test time.
Sixty-nine,
Eighty-three, letters it takes for me to confess that I don’t want to roam this earth without you by my side.
One hundred and forty-three, It’ll be okay, as long as you know that you’re worth it and won’t give in to every single hick up even though your mortal self can’t help it.
Here, I learn he doesn’t deal with anger,
it’s the way to talk out his own insecurities.
Mine showed their tattooed faces at the first sign of a rain drop
no forecast of showers
towers blocking the sun
gun cocked to my own forehead
dread as I lower my own arm;
One hundred and forty-four, one day these worries will mute, the button is jammed in the remote but it’ll pop out, just have to keep counting.
My Hero
Flipping channels
through all these different success stories
a chance to make a life
to be someones
either through blood
or opportunity.
Them being their, doesn’t mean they’re the best
waiting for the next great to pick up that shield
a Captain is always on the way.
I watch, knowing someone who sings better
paints better
and at the age of four
I learned that people are not born equal
death is a guarantee
and failure is a privilege,
not all of us see the stars.
So will flip channels
pretend that these people never scaled that mountain
and reached
even for a second
to be someones hero;
even if they can’t see the same stairs
or know how to walk
those heroes reach an arm out
lend an ear see the sea smell the breeze
they’ll be there for tough times
sing their song
end their show
with us in our living room
thank you
but I’ll be their one day
with all my might.
Dinner Time
Since you came
I haven’t needed another-
closed all the shops in my heart
no more tourist- a lonley lurker looking for their old room;
just a mansion
for you.
Candles and sweets
I never want you to leave
I’ve never felt so full:
full on filling conversations
dining on our connection
resting on our full bellies-
looking up at our ceiling
counting the wrinkles on our palms,
your hands are so soft I fall asleep in this dream.
I wake to your voice
sleep to it
and crave it like the next meal.
Breather
It’s that time of year,
to spread love and joy
just love yourself at the end
in the safety of your bed
or out loud with a gift
say you had a hell of a year
all the ups and downs
be proud of you
Swimming Lessons
I never got to say, thank you-
you, you acted as my shield from the world
my iron suit that I walked around in
talking shit like Tony Stark
now I know I was never in the ballpark
bat at home swinging with papier-mache at a tee ball stand.
I don’t know what you were worried about-
I picked plenty of roses and never cut myself
gave the neighbors cat a bath and she didn’t run away
and neither did I.
I did enjoy the days you would show me the light
like a present the sunshine was to my skin
your hand was loose but always in mine
a child in body and lost in the mind.
Thank you, for caring
you never told me the wonders of the light
when the sun touches the water
when your hand touched mine- it was the same
you didn’t show me, I had to swim on my own.
I never asked why you were so protective
and no one has ever been since,
but I learned how to swim
so hopefully you can rest easy.
Saint's Muse 